George Hathaway

Monday, January 26th, I received a call from QH, love of my life, that made me almost drop the phone. His Dad, George, had a heart attack and he was on the way to the hospital. I asked him if he wanted me to go with him and he said for me to go ahead and go to work. I did. It then sounded hopeful that if he woke up right away, all would be good.

By Wednesday, the prognosis was not good. They said he was having seizures which were the cause of brain damage from lack of oxygen. Even though Charlene, QH's Mom, did compressions until the medics got there, it was too late by that time. There was nothing more that could be done and today, Thursday, the news from the doctor was there is no brain activity.

George had a Health Care Directive or a Living Will which specifically states that in the event of such a situation as this, the family and the medical team is to honor his wishes and not recuscitate. This would have been followed on Monday, if the tests had shown what was going on, but the results did not show it until today. So, the decision is for the family to have him taken off life support tomorrow after Charlene's brother has arrived from Idaho. My son, Alex, who is in the Navy, is coming home. I contacted him through the Red Cross and they are allowing him to come home to say goodbye to Grandpa Hathaway.

I'm numb. I go from moments of complete grief where I feel I can't stop crying, to almost sounding normal. I don't know what to do. I am trying to concentrate on doing something to keep my mind off of things, but I keep thinking about him and about QH who is trying to be strong, but I know how close he and his Dad are and how much he is going to feel this loss.

We all are.

I'm so glad that we all had the holidays together again, and that Alex and QH's son, Andy, were there to celebrate them with us.

I'm going to miss his laugh, his large, booming voice in the house, and him telling me about something he read or a book he's reading. He read Popular Science, Popular Mechanics, Mother Earth News, farming magazines, and would read a stack of westerns from the library each week.

That's what he was doing when this all happened. He was sitting in his chair, reading a book, then fell right over. Melissa's daughter said she wanted to know what the last book he was reading was, and that he was on a great adventure since that would be the last thing on his mind. He always talked to his kids, his grandkids, his great-grand kids, and if you were just sitting there, he would come over and start a conversation.

We were going to begin the story of his life, writing all of it down for the family and I promise that I will do that. It won't be the same, not told in the voice of George, but I will do the best I can.

When your family and friends take over the waiting room and it's standing room only at the hospital, then you know that you have lived a good life. Many tears were shed today, and many more will follow, but one thing I can say about George Hathaway: He was loved.

Please pray for all of us, this is going to be hard to get through.

Hug everyone you love, forgive those who harmed you in any way and let it go, and get your affairs in order by getting a Health Care Directive/Living Will and a Will or Estate Plan for your family. You may not have tomorrow.

Nightmare on Wall Street

I'm not one of those financial wizards that watch the ticker tape go by on CNN to see how my stocks are doing. I'm a writer for crying out loud. I stick to what I know and what I'm good at, and that's trying to offer hope and entertainment in the darkest of days.

I'm interested in the markets for a few reasons, though, and when they show the grim numbers and it makes the news as the top story, over the election and the 2 wars we are in, it gets my attention. I work at a plastics factory to pay the bills. Plastics is affected by the oil prices. QH is in the housing construction field and this winter is looking kind of bleak for new construction. I won't rehash the news from today, we all know what it is, but I want to offer a bit of hope.

If this is truly the bottom, we need to celebrate.

Yes, you read that correctly, CELEBRATE!!

This year has involved me learning the Law of Attraction (I can hear QH groaning right now, please bear with me, honey). What you think about, you attract, whether you want it or not. Why? You put all of your energy behind it and when you think it's the end of the world, what happens? The floor falls out beneath you. So, logically, if this is the bottom, then we may bounce for a little bit up and down, but we will eventually climb out of this and rebound.

"What goes up, must come down," as Newton found out with the apple. We have been heading down, with all of the "experts" predicting the worst was yet to come. Today was that day. It's all up from here.

How can I be so "positive" when the rest of the world is going to hell? It's what keeps me going. I am, have always been, and will always be an OPTIMIST.

The glass is half full and there's plenty more where that came from. We have all been led to believe that there is limitation and lack and limits to everything. But what we have NOT been told is this condition of "not having" is TEMPORARY.

Wait a bit, be patient, ask for what you need or want and then take ACTION. If you are sitting on your couch watching Oprah thinking the Universe, or God is going to just deliver your desires to your lap, well, you may lose the house, the couch and the television set and then proclaim the Law of Attraction is a bunch of crap.

Action is the way. My beloved QH has a saying, "Let's just go DO SOMETHING, even if it's wrong!" Any kind of action is going to take you in the direction of what you want and your goals. Even if you are going in the opposite direction, you will learn something (like maybe you should turn around?) and who knows who you might meet along the way?

A lot of people are going to lose a lot because of this market shift. There are those in Texas and Louisiana who have lost that and more, and are just trying to make it from day to day. I feel their pain. I have felt that loss, that feeling that the world just tipped upside down like a snow globe and you are going to hit the ground hard and it will hurt when the world rights itself again. As I told my son this last week, when he didn't accomplish a goal he set for himself because of some kind of snafu, Life can be disappointing sometimes. Sometimes there is a blessing in not getting what you want right away. It may keep you from some other disaster.

We all need to appreciate what we have, what our priorities are, and find something to laugh about. It will help reduce the stress. It will make you feel grateful and it will bring about a sense of serenity, even if it is just for a moment or two. Make a list of all the things you are grateful for: Your life, each breath you take, your family, your friends, the roof over your head, the job you hate that still pays the bills, the talents God has given to you that will hopefully pay off in a book contract someday (oh, that's mine!). Little things add up, and when you feel the gratitude from your head to your toes, magical things happen.

And turn off the television until the news is better. There is a fine line between being informed and being overwhelmed into depression. Be informed, be grateful, and learn to live with less.

And get a hug from someone you care about. It helps a lot.

If you can, even if it is just a dollar, give to the Red Cross or your local church, or donate to another worthy cause. The feeling you get from it makes you feel like you can make a difference, even in some small way.

Remember, you get as good as you give. We will all get through this together.

Oh, and pray. It can't hurt.