Cooler Sunday

Last night we were at the Wolf Den for the Annual Pirate Party when we noticed the weather changed quite drastically. There was a small shower that passed through and then it was like all the heat and humidity was sucked out by the blowing wind. I was ready to head to the car to get my jacket, but I braved it out until we went home. It was so nice and cool and refreshing! I didn't want it to end! And the breeze was keeping the mosquitos at bay so it was wonderful to be outside.

Today we spent most of the day with the windows wide open and the air conditioning off. Man, what a difference that makes! Much cooler Sunday, makes for a more productive and happier me. I was going to spend the day in the house cleaning and cooking and other things, but instead, Alex and I went to the video store in Zimmerman to rent some movies. Then we headed to my parents house to see my Dad who just returned home from North Dakota on Saturday night. He's the last one to see Alex's hand, and we gave him some excellent black grapes we bought at Jim's Market in Zimmerman. Mom and Dad sent home some homegrown potatoes, cucumbers, and cherry tomatoes along with a piece of smoked fish and some salt water pickles.

In telling the story of what happened to Alex on Thursday night, we noticed something. Thursday, August 12, is George's birthday. George is QH's Dad who passed away in January of 2009. And the name of the surgeon was George Landis. I believe QH's Dad was watching over Alex the night of the accident.

I am still so very grateful he didn't have a worse injury than what he had. I'm still fighting that mother's instinct to do everything for him because he's my baby and he's hurt. But Alex is a grown man, and not a baby anymore. He wants to do as much for himself as he can, and yes, just like his mother, he won't ask for help unless it's absolutely necessary, meaning, as a last resort. I know that if I baby him, he'll be worse off, and he will not heal. If he meets the challenges he's facing on his own, in his own way, he will speed his own recovery, and hopefully stave off any depression or feelings of uselessness he might have with only being able to use one hand. It's a hard lesson for both of us, but we will be stronger for it.

This has been a hard week for lessons. In the town of Zimmerman, a young man named Glen "Bubba" Bye died in a car accident two weeks ago. He was the quarterback of the Zimmerman Thunder football team and a baseball player with a very bright future. He was on his way to work when he fell asleep at the wheel and crashed into a tree. A Good Samaritan was with him after finding him, so he was not alone when he died, according to his mother on a recent news report.

I cannot imagine what pain that family is going through. My son is home, he's broken right now, but he's going to be okay. I worried about him being on the ship when he was in the Navy, when he went to Haiti during Operation Unified Response and when he was in South America. I imagined all sorts of horrible things happening that didn't happen, and then he comes home and this happens.

In true Crawford Tradition, if things are going really well, start worrying. Something's coming and it ain't good. I was hoping and praying Alex would be unscathed, but it was not meant to be. I know he must be playing the "What If?" game, "If I'd only done this, not that, then I would be ok." Well, those games don't change what's happened. The best use of your energy and time is to heal from what's happened and move on, remembering the lessons learned.

Observations On Birthdays, Classic Cars and Temp Jobs

Since my last post, I've turned a year older (June 11th). Considering how the last year was, I'm grateful I'm still alive and kicking. I'm also grateful I still have everything and everyone in my life.

Ironically, one year to the day I lost my full time job at the plastics factory in Rogers, I was cancelled at a plastics factory in Maple Plain I was hoping would be a temp-to-hire position.

It was more devastating than the first time because as hard as it was to lose my job and the friends I had there in Rogers, it was even harder this time because I had such high expectations. I talked to the staffing agency and asked what on Earth happened. No reason, really, just that's just the way the temp job-ball- bounces. As my son is fond of saying, "Here's your straw. Now suck it up."

I can't help taking it personally, and I also can't help getting attached to the people I work with. I'm a social butterfly. If you think about it, we all spend more time with the people we work with than we do with our own immediate families. When you click as a working unit and you all get along and help each other, it's a great thing, not just for the company's bottom line, but for everyone. I loved the hours, I didn't mind the drive (about a 35 to 45 minutes from my doorstep to the plant). I even had a lady who was car pooling with me who lived a few blocks away from me! That never happens in Zimmerman, Minnesota!

But then, I ended up working last week in a thermoforming plastics plant in Elk River. It was plastics, larger parts and windshields and stuff, but I had no idea what I was in for. All I knew was I needed a paycheck coming in. Thursday morning, my lightbulb moment occurred.

After four nights of working there, the last night I nearly passed out from the heat. In order for the plastic parts to be formed, there are sheets that must be placed on a tray and put into an oven set at volcanic. The sheets come out of the oven, and are pressed into a mold and then you trim them and package them. They are not running at full capacity on the 3rd shift...yet.

I decided after surviving that final night cutting out windshields in a corner with no fan and next to one of those ovens, I would be dead in another week. Heat exhaustion is not fun. I'm so surprised I didn't end up in the emergency room. I came home, took a shower then turned the cold water on as long as I could stand it because I was so overheated my skin looked like I had a sunburn.

As the cold water ran down my head to my feet I had a life altering thought. "I'm not going back. There is a better way to make money that won't kill me. I'll do whatever it takes, work any other job, but not this one or anything like it, ever again."

I got out of the shower, dried off, put on my PJ's and called the staffing agency and told them I would like a different job, please. I told them I would not be able to perform the job effectively because of the heat and the physicality of the job itself. You need more strength to lift those heavy and awkward sheets of plastic, and if I was 100 pounds lighter and 20 years younger, I might be ok. But the realization set in I'm not, and I can do so much more than kill myself at a job I can't perform as well as they want, nor, do I want to.

I say it's the equivalent of hitting bottom. I know now what I will do and won't do for a paycheck. You won't hear me complaining about flipping burgers, asking if you want fries with that or scrubbing toilets. Any job right now, will be a blessing.

Since then, I've been severely dehydrated and drinking water as much as possible to keep from getting sick. My hands are swollen, but I'm hoping it will pass once my system is flushed out. Ok, enough whining. On to more fun things.

This weekend is Back to the 50's weekend at the Minnesota State Fairgrounds. I'll be posting some pictures at my website, http://www.lauramcrawford.com/, and you can get a taste below of some of the more unusual cars on display.

Alex was still feeling under the weather, but QH and I did our fair share of walking until our feet hurt. Because we had a dinner date at Jesse & Patrice's, we came home about noonish, had a sandwich for lunch and then took a nap until it was time to head out to their house.

Ava, who is now 15 months old, woke up when we got there. She was so funny walking around barefoot in her little summer dress. I read to her, and we played trucks and "peek-a-boo." I always seem to get my perspective when I visit her.

I'm a bad Gamma because I don't visit her enough. That's another lightbulb moment I had, was realizing how fast she's growing up and her little sister will be arriving in September, and I need to spend more time with her.

I look at Alex, my son, and can't believe he's now 21 years old, has served in the Navy, done all the things he's done, and seen all the places he's seen. It's hard to look back at how short the time is when your kids are little. You think at the time, they will always stay the same, they will always be your kid. And in a lot of ways, he still is, but he's now a young man. I'm so proud of him and regret the times I wasn't there for him. I hope he doesn't hold it against me.

Spend more time with your kids, please, because it flies by faster than you think.

Happy 1st Birthday, Ava!

On March 17, 2009, Ava Jeanne was born.

Today, March 20, 2010, we celebrated her first birthday. She is a beautiful baby girl, who has two doggies, Brody, a Yorkshire Terrier, and Tank, a Husky with one blue eye and one brown eye, and two wonderful parents who love and adore her. The house was standing room only as it filled with family and friends to celebrate the first year of this blessing from heaven.

She was dressed in a white shirt with white leggings trimmed in lace and a purple flower on the front and a purple Tutu made by Mom. She had a purple bow in her hair. She was all smiles and waving and was a little shy at first until the presents.

We left so she could take a nap.

You never know how precious life is until you become a parent and then a grandparent and hold that little life in your arms for the first time. Your heart fills with love you didn't know it had and it fills your whole body and soul to the point it almost aches. It's a feeling I have each time I hold that little girl, or my nephew, Cannon, or hug my son, who is now a grown Navy man soon to be 21. If anyone goes through this life without ever experiencing that feeling, you haven't really lived. I feel sorry for you.

Today the sun came out and it was bright and clear, even if it was a little colder than a few days ago, but we were all happy the weather was nice at least for her party and the shoes could all be kicked out of the house on the front step instead of in the doorway.

Thanks, Patrice and Jesse for throwing your baby girl such a wonderful party, and I'm glad to see she loves chocolate as much as her Grandma Sissy!

Ava, Happy Birthday honey! Pappa and I love you very much. :)

George Hathaway

Monday, January 26th, I received a call from QH, love of my life, that made me almost drop the phone. His Dad, George, had a heart attack and he was on the way to the hospital. I asked him if he wanted me to go with him and he said for me to go ahead and go to work. I did. It then sounded hopeful that if he woke up right away, all would be good.

By Wednesday, the prognosis was not good. They said he was having seizures which were the cause of brain damage from lack of oxygen. Even though Charlene, QH's Mom, did compressions until the medics got there, it was too late by that time. There was nothing more that could be done and today, Thursday, the news from the doctor was there is no brain activity.

George had a Health Care Directive or a Living Will which specifically states that in the event of such a situation as this, the family and the medical team is to honor his wishes and not recuscitate. This would have been followed on Monday, if the tests had shown what was going on, but the results did not show it until today. So, the decision is for the family to have him taken off life support tomorrow after Charlene's brother has arrived from Idaho. My son, Alex, who is in the Navy, is coming home. I contacted him through the Red Cross and they are allowing him to come home to say goodbye to Grandpa Hathaway.

I'm numb. I go from moments of complete grief where I feel I can't stop crying, to almost sounding normal. I don't know what to do. I am trying to concentrate on doing something to keep my mind off of things, but I keep thinking about him and about QH who is trying to be strong, but I know how close he and his Dad are and how much he is going to feel this loss.

We all are.

I'm so glad that we all had the holidays together again, and that Alex and QH's son, Andy, were there to celebrate them with us.

I'm going to miss his laugh, his large, booming voice in the house, and him telling me about something he read or a book he's reading. He read Popular Science, Popular Mechanics, Mother Earth News, farming magazines, and would read a stack of westerns from the library each week.

That's what he was doing when this all happened. He was sitting in his chair, reading a book, then fell right over. Melissa's daughter said she wanted to know what the last book he was reading was, and that he was on a great adventure since that would be the last thing on his mind. He always talked to his kids, his grandkids, his great-grand kids, and if you were just sitting there, he would come over and start a conversation.

We were going to begin the story of his life, writing all of it down for the family and I promise that I will do that. It won't be the same, not told in the voice of George, but I will do the best I can.

When your family and friends take over the waiting room and it's standing room only at the hospital, then you know that you have lived a good life. Many tears were shed today, and many more will follow, but one thing I can say about George Hathaway: He was loved.

Please pray for all of us, this is going to be hard to get through.

Hug everyone you love, forgive those who harmed you in any way and let it go, and get your affairs in order by getting a Health Care Directive/Living Will and a Will or Estate Plan for your family. You may not have tomorrow.

"Thank You God For All The Blessings I Have, and All The Blessings I Am Receiving"

The quote above is my own sort of mantra. I say it when I get up in the morning before my feet hit the carpet and I say it before my head lands on the pillow when I go to bed at night.

I found that little gem in a book called "Spiritual Marketing" by Dr. Joe Vitale. If you have the opportunity, whether you are into marketing or not, I highly recommend reading it, several times. It was a quote that resonated with me and I feel immense gratitude when I say it, twice a day. It forces me to stop, think and reflect on what is truly important in my life and be thankful for all of it.

The reason I am sharing this with you, is this is the season of Thanks, and of Giving. In this time and space in all of our lives, it is not the presents under the tree that will be important this holiday season, no matter what holiday you celebrate. We all have begun to take a moment and decide what is truly important in our lives, and it isn't accumulating more "stuff".

I received a gift on Tuesday evening that was "priceless", as the commercial says.

It was a snowy evening and I had been trying to reach LOML (Love of My Life), QH, for most of that day. I drove to work and knew that with the snow and the wind and the way the roads were shaping up, it was going to be a bad commute home for my honey. I wanted to let him know that there were several cars in the ditches on the way to work, and that the snow was sticking to the roads as the temperatures dropped dramatically. We went from 38 degrees ABOVE ZERO, and would be at MINUS 3 degrees before the end of the night.

Minnesota weather, gotta love it! :)

So, after several tries at the office and on his cell, I thought he might be over helping his Dad plow out, and thought, "I'll call him later," and went about working. Around 8:00 pm, I decided I would try one more time at home and if he wasn't there, his Mom & Dad's house. I was sitting at the table where we trim and inspect parts when I saw QH standing next to me!

"Hi, honey! What are you doing here?" I was thrilled, and felt like the good old LOA (Law of Attraction) was really working!! I had him on my mind all night and here he was!

"I brought you a present!" He said, and I saw a little sparkle in his eye. I followed him out into the warehouse and when I turned the corner...

There he stood, in his Navy Blues, and it took a few seconds for my brain to register it...

My son, Alex, home for Christmas!! And two days early!!!

Or so I thought! Turns out, he and QH and my dear brother (Kudos, to Andy for not letting the secret out!!), had been conspiring about this since the weekend before Thanksgiving when QH and I took Thanksgiving dinner to Illinois for Alex.

"It's Not Thursday!" I blurted out. What the hell was wrong with me? My son is here!! He's Home!!!

"Did I say Thursday? I meant Tuesday!" he said, grinning. I went over and hugged and hugged him and kissed him and hugged him. Was this real? Is he really here? God, if this is a dream, please don't let me wake up yet!!

I looked behind him, and there was QH, and I could see he was trying to look away at us, and I think I saw a tear, but that could have been something in his eyes (like the size of a boulder !) ;)

I went around the plant and introduced him to the other people on my shift, and then they were off to my parents house to give them a heart attack. I hugged QH and said, "Thank you, thank you, thank you," and he was gone with Alex out the door.

I made my way back to the clean room, and in the darkness of the warehouse, the tears began to stream down my face. The shock had passed, and the waterworks were going. I looked up and said, "Thank you God for all the Blessings I have and all the Blessings I am receiving." I felt a part of my heart open up, and felt love. Pure love. And Gratitude.

I wiped the tears, blew my nose and went back to work. I knew my Mom would be calling soon, and I was right. The joy in her voice was perfect, and I knew my Dad would be more cheerful now that his "buddy" was back in town. We tried to surprise my sister, but Dad let the secret slip, but that's ok. She was excited to see him on Thursday. Cannon got to see him on Wednesday, and remembered who he was, and was a little shy at first, but by the end of the day, he was Alex's shadow.

It's the best Christmas present I ever received, and I am in awe of QH for pulling it off. The thoughtfulness, the love, he demonstrated, I have no words.

All I know, is that man deserves a Harley!! Some way, some how, I am going to make that dream manifest.

With a big red bow! And then I will be standing back with a "boulder" in my eyes!!

Until then, he has my heart, my love, my undying gratitude.

Thanks, honey.

We're leaving tomorrow...

For Illinois. I am still cooking, mainly because I was lazy and slept last night. I ran around town today getting the last minute stuff, and also reprioritizing (whew that's a big word!), some of my lists. I decided there were things I was not going to get done, some things that could wait, and a few that just were not that important to begin with. I never used to do that. I would just run my butt off trying to do all of it, and failing miserably. Now, I find that my time is much more precious, and I'm not getting a medal if I accomplish all of that anyway.

Enlightenment is wonderful, isn't it?

I am still doing the NaNoWriMo novel, and I have not had time to write anything except grocery and to do lists for the last few days, but I will finish, before the deadline. I know I was trying to have everything said and done by November 14, but I had to reprioritize my life a bit (love that word!).

I am very excited to be seeing Alex again. I am wondering how much he has changed in the last couple of months. I know this won't be such a long stretch in seeing him, since he will be home around December 19, 2008. We don't know for how long, yet, but I have learned to go with the flow. I can't drive myself nuts over things I have no control over. It's a huge waste of time and energy, and I am way too tired right now to do that!

I will log back in on Monday, and I hope you all have a great weekend. And please say a few prayers the weather is going to be nice for our trip. Thanks a lot!

And for those who are still doing NaNo, keep on writing!!!

Happy Halloween & Let's Get Ready to Write!!

Happy Halloween, everybody!

It looks like the weather is going to cooperate with us this year. Temps are expected to be in the 60's, no blizzards, no precipitation of any kind, so the little ghouls and goblins should have a great time and come home with a huge bag of goodies.

I'm remembering how much fun I had taking my son, Alex, around to trick-or-treat when he was little. I wasn't really into the spirit of it this year, because he's still in Illinois, serving our country in the Navy. Last night I headed to Walmart because our coffee maker died and we needed a new one, and I ended up buying a table cloth, a witch hat, a candy bowl and a bag of candy and some treat bags. We don't usually get trick-or-treaters here, we're too far out of town, but my nephew, Cannon, is supposed to visit. He's Remy the Rat from the movie "Ratatouille". I can't wait to see him in his costume.

Or the pictures, is what I should say. I have to work tonight. Dangit. That's ok, Uncle Dude will be here.

The second part of my title is referring to National Novel Writing Month, which kicks off tonight at midnight. My goal this year is to be finished in 14 days, which is doable for me, I just have to double my daily word count, which is on average 2,000 words per day. I have my loose outline ready, just basically my premise and a few character names, and I am ready to write!

I also have a goal to take this year's novel to a publisher. I want to do something with the other novels I wrote that I still have lurking in my hard drive and on my backup disk. I haven't decided if I am going to combine them into one novel or try and rewrite them into a series. I'll see how things go this year and decide then.

I have also joined a new group, started by my good friend, Dorothy Thompson. She is moderator of "The Writing Life" writing group and owner and operator of her own online book promotion business called Pump Up Your Book Promotion. She has created a blog writing group to help writers who have blogs to up their SEO (Search Engine Optimization), by having the members visit each other's blogs and leave comments. It will help all of us increase our traffic to our blogs, our websites and hopefully, create more clients and opportunities for all of us. The group is called "PumpUpYourBlog" and it's through Yahoo! Groups. Here's the link: pumpupyourblog@yahoogroups.com.

One of the rules of membership is we have to blog at least 3 times a week. So you will all be hearing from me a lot more. Now, whether that's a good thing or a bad thing, that depends on what I write about. LOL!! Just kidding.

One thing I do want to say, please get out and vote on Tuesday.
I know we are all sick and tired of the election coverage, the negative campaign ads, the lies and empty promises made by the candidates and their opponents, but this is more important this election year than in any other.

I don't care which party you are with, or what issues you would like to see changed, but it is our civic duty to vote. When you look back in history and see what women went through just to fight for the right to vote, you will make every effort, wait in any line for any length of time to vote.

We are privileged and blessed in this country beyond reason, and our men and women in our armed services fight everyday for our freedoms. Don't disrespect their sacrifices, their families sacrifices, by not making every effort to vote your conscience.

If you aren't registered yet to vote, there is still time, depending on what state you live in. You can check it out at JustVote.org.

Have a great Halloween and a great weekend! I'll post my word count progress through the next couple of weeks and if anyone else is participating for NaNoWriMo, comment here and we can cheer each other on.

Saturday, August 16, 2008-The Navy Pier

The next morning, Saturday, found us heading early in the morning to Flanagan's for the breakfast buffet. We were the first ones there and were treated to scrambled eggs (Alex was thrilled they were REAL eggs, not powdered), bacon, sausage links, pancakes, waffles, french toast, corn beef hash, hash brown potatoes, fruit and juice. And the coffee was hot and delicious!

It was fabulous! Once breakfast was done, we decided to head down to the Navy Pier.

That weekend was the same weekend an Air & Boat Show was going on, so traffic was intense. We found a place to park and then made our way to the pier. Once we arrived, we decided to ride the giant ferris wheel that is there, and took some pictures from the top of the ferris wheel, which is 150 feet off the ground. It took about 8 minutes for the ride to be over and we got our picture taken, so of course, I bought a couple of them. Alex got one, and we came home with the other one.

Another event that weekend was the Turkish World Festival. We saw a lot of people walking around and smelled the most wonderful food cooking. We then saw the band walk by us in full costume, which was really cool.

We then toured the rest of the pier and made our way into the Family Pavilion. Alex saw the Imax Theatre and had mentioned that he wanted to see "The Dark Knight", so he bought tickets for all of us. We then found a place to have lunch, and sit for a while until the movie started.

Let me just say, it's a shame Heath Ledger is gone. His performance and the performance given by Aaron Eckhart (Two Face), were both brilliant. If neither one gets an Oscar nomination it will be a crime. The effects were fantastic and to see them in the Imax was beyond belief. I also saw the trailer for "Watchmen" another superhero type film, directed by the director who made "300", and based on the graphic novel. Unfortunately, "Watchmen" won't be coming to theaters until Spring of 2009. But I plan to see it.

After the movie, we came out and there was a huge crowd of people everywhere! We walked out and began walking along the pier, watching the tour boats coming in and going out when there was the sound of jets, flying over and we looked up to see the Blue Angels!!! I had never seen them before, not in person, anyway, and the Navy sailors on the pier all cheered. It was incredible! They flew back and forth in manuevers and formations for about 20 minutes! We tried to get pictures, but they were so fast, we could barely catch them on our digital cameras. It was a bonus for us, because we heard the show had been delayed and we would have missed the last part of the Blue Angels if it had been on time. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

We did some more driving around, then that night we ended up eating the homemade enchiladas at the hotel lobby, watching the Discovery Channel on the flatscreen television there. QH's mom sent along some macaroni salad and I had some fajitas from Flanagan's I had brought back from the night before. After dinner, we decided to get to Wal-Mart so I could get a charger for my phone. Kathy, the waitress, gave spot-on directions and we found the nearest Wal-Mart and got what we needed.


On the way back to the hotel, we stopped for gas, and while QH was inside getting ice and paying for the gas, I noticed Alex was quieter than he had been Friday night and asked him if he was ok.

"Yeah, it's just weird being out in the real world again, you know?" I realized then, he had been through a lot, and he said it better than I ever could. "For the first two weeks, I didn't even have a thought! Not one, and then when I did, it was like 'Hellooo? It's me, Al', and now, I'm here listening to music, and watching television, and eating REAL food."


"Yes, and you know what? The worst of this is over. You made it, son. And I'm so proud of you, we all are." Since I was sitting in the backseat of the car, all I could do was squeeze his shoulder.


It was going to be hard leaving him here, but in a way, it would be easier knowing he was on his way to bigger and better things. But it was still going to be hard. In that moment, I sympathized with those parents who are leaving their kids at college for the first time, leaving them behind and driving home without them. I prayed for strength. I needed all the help I could get.

Graduation Day: Navy Style

The date was August 15, 2008, and this picture was taken by my dearest, QH, right after the stunning ceremony and when liberty call was given. I have never in my life seen such a display of skill and precision in all of my life, and probably never will again. If you have a spouse or child in the armed services, I highly recommend you attend this ceremony.

Without boring you with all the details, let me just hit the high points. We left Thursday morning and hit rain and road construction from Wisconsin to Chicago. Once we arrived there, we got lost following my TripTix that was wrong. Finally we made it to our hotel, checked in and went for a drive, trying to get our bearings. It was a good thing QH invested in a GPS.

Friday morning, I was very glad I picked a hotel that was only 1.8 miles from the base. We left the hotel and hit traffic that would make a Floridian think it was Spring Break. It took us about a half an hour to make to our destination.

We knew that with the dangers in this world, there would be security. Random searches were being conducted in the dozen or so cars to our right. We were in a different group and the most we had was a large German Shepard who sniffed around our car while they checked our ID's. We were directed to park and after going through another check, we made our way to the building where the graduation was to be held.

We were not allowed to take any pictures of our recruit/graduate out in front of any of the buildings or our cameras would be confiscated and the memory cards and film wiped clean and returned. That is the state of the world we live in today, my friends. Totally understandable on their part, and I never felt so safe leaving stuff in the car before.

Once we were seated in the section of Alex's division (293), we waited for things to begin, and watched a short film showing all the things the recruits had been through (hair shaving, ironing, fire training and the "confidence chamber", a.k.a. the gas chamber where they experience tear gas with and without the gas mask), and then the band came in. Then all the brass came in and were seated. Then the flags came in, carried by graduating recruits and representing each of the 50 states in the order they were added to the Union.

As each division came through, I searched all over looking for Alex, but couldn't find him until near the end of the ceremony when QH pointed him out off to the right and in the back. He wasn't wearing the "Sally Jesse Raphael" style glasses like I pictured and instead wore his "civilian" glasses.

I was ok emotionally until the Star Spangled Banner and the tears began to roll as I stood, hand over my heart thinking about how these young men and women were here to serve this great country of ours, the United States of America, and all of those who had passed through those doors on a day, just like that day, and went on to make the ultimate sacrifice. I looked around and I was not alone in being emotional, even if our thoughts were different, our skin color was different and we all came from different places. In that building, at that moment, I was proud to be a citizen of America and felt sure that everyone else in that place, felt that very same thing.

Once the review was over, and the liberty call was made, the wave of unbridled joy and happiness almost knocked you over! We made our way onto the floor and found Alex, and took some pictures. I didn't turn into a blubbering idiot, crying and running over to him, because I didn't want to embarrass him. I was just so happy to see him, and I think he was happy to see us.

On the way to the car, we received the best gift of all. Because he was only moving from RTC (Recruit Training Command) to another section on base, he was given liberty overnight on Friday and Saturday! He had to move the day of graduation, so we went back to the hotel and asked them if we could get a room with 2 beds, not just one. We were blessed to get one, and we were so happy that we would have that extra time with him.

One of the first things we did was go to dinner. We found a nice little place called Flanagan's, just down the road from the hotel, and we had dinner there. The town was full of graduating recruits and their families. We met a nice young man that Alex was in boot camp with and his family and found out they lived in Watertown, Minnesota.

The food was great and plentiful and priced fairly. Our waitress, Kathy (or Cathy), was kind enough to give us some tips about cleaning white uniforms with club soda, and also drew us directions to Wal-Mart on the map on the back of one of their menus. We saw they had a breakfast buffet on Saturday and Sunday mornings, so we decided to come back the next morning for that.

We drove all over, mostly down Sheridan Drive where the snazzy lake homes were and Alex got to see Lake Michigan. I had him call my parents and talk to them, and he called my brother and talked to him. I ran out of minutes before he could call my sister, and then my battery went dead and we had to go to Wal-Mart to buy a charger because I forgot my chargers at home.

Our plan for Saturday was to find the Navy Pier. Some friends recommended we go there if we didn't go anyplace else. We mapped out where we needed to be and went back to the hotel for sleep.

A Phone Call, More Letters & Some Good News

Alex called me on July 14. I know, you're looking at the date wondering why I didn't blog then instead of now. A lot has been happening around here.

First, the phone call. He called me when I was at work, and I have a huge dose of "Mommy Guilt" because I didn't recognize his voice on the phone at first. He sounded good, and a lot of my worries were laid to rest when I heard the tone of his voice. He says boot sucks, of course, but it's not as bad as he thought it was going to be, and he figured out right away that if you do what you're told, do it the way they want it done and keep your mouth shut, you're ok. He said some in his division haven't figured that out yet. He was in great spirits, and it sounded like he's having the time of his life. I know he's going to be great and successful in his Navy career.

Graduation is August 15, and QH and I are going. I would walk in hot asphalt in my bare feet to get there, if I had to, so there will be no stopping me from seeing him graduate. We have our reservations set, and I'm looking forward to seeing him. He'll have liberty that weekend so we can go have some fun. Then he goes to school, which will be there in Great Lakes, so he only has to move across the street.

He's also sent a few letters since then. The latest arrived on Thursday. He said he as 4 weeks of school and then he can come home for a leave. It would be sometime in October. He said he would be home for Christmas. (Yea!)

I can't wait for him to read the latest letter I sent him. I'm sure he's going to laugh. We got some news this week, some good news.

QH called me and asked if I felt "older". No, not really, why? He said he did and I asked why. "I'm going to be a grandpa."

What??

Yep, it's true. His son, Jess and his fiancee, Patrice, are expecting!! I guess in a round about way, that makes me "Grandma"!!

I cried. Of course, I did. Tears of joy. I know I'm only 39, but it doesn't matter. Alex always teased that I would be a Grandma before I hit 40!! He's going to crack up laughing when he finds out.

I'm happy for them and pray the baby is healthy. I told QH that we would spoil the child and send him or her home!! No problem with that!! It's going to be fun, and great practice for when Alex settles down (in about 30 years) and has kids!!

The writing career is well under way, and now I have more motivation to retire early. I'll have a grandbaby to chase around!!

Have a great weekend!

Happy 4th of July!!

Sometimes I wonder what the hell goes through my head.

I misunderstood QH when we were talking about plans for this weekend. I thought we had nothing going on, so I offered to dogsit for my parents (Molly, the Sheltie), and for my sister, Kelley and her husband (Boney the Bulldog). Well, lets just say things at home have been tense the last few days, and now I am sitting at home blogging while he's up north fishing at Lake Mille Lacs. Sigh.

Don't feel sorry for me, I was the one who agreed to dogsit, not him. I didn't expect him to stay home with me over the weekend being pissed about us having 2 dogs in the house. Serves me right for not clarifying our plans in the first place. I hope he's catching fish, at least, and he's not alone. He's staying up there with our friends, Bob and Connie at their cabin.

Just for the record, this will be the LAST TIME I dogsit. The bulldog has been a pain in the ass. He doesn't listen. He chases anything with wheels. He crapped right outside my deck where QH stepped in it this morning. He took off down the road with Molly running behind him and he wouldn't come back. I thought Molly would be the bigger pain! She's been an angel!!

Anyway, the neighbors have been having a great fireworks show around here. The dogs don't like it though. They both want me to pet them, comfort them, and they both want to sit in my lap while I'm on the computer. The noise has finally settled down, and the show was great! They are still hiding in the corner.

I'm hoping to get some writing work done since I'm alone here in the house. Maybe that's why God gave me the Senior Moment and had me screw up my weekend so I could write, get my stuff done and make some money. I know, it's a stretch, but I'll take it. And I got the day off at the factory, so that's a plus also.

The 4th of July isn't just picnics, parades and fireworks. It's time with your family and friends, the celebration of summer's peak. The corn is knee high (or close to it here). The crops are a little behind this year. The weather today has been fabulous. We have a lot to be grateful for in the United States of America, the greatest country in the world.

If you meet someone who is a veteran, or someone in active military duty, no matter what branch of the service they are in, walk up to them, shake their hand, and THANK THEM. We have the rights we do, and the ability to exercise those rights and we have our military men and women to thank for that. Even if you don't agree with the war in Iraq, our men and women are still serving in a VOLUNTEER military, and we need to support them any way we can. Their families are making the sacrifice as well, and if there is anything you can do to help them out, do it. Make donations to organizations that serve our military families, or veterans. Adopt a soldier through organizations like Operation Minnesota Nice. Even just a card or letter expressing your thanks will mean the world to them.

No call from my son in Navy boot camp. But I'm sure he's celebrating this 4th of July in a manner that he will never forget. And I'm so proud to be his Mom.

Have a safe and Happy 4th of July weekend!!

I GOT A LETTER!!

Yesterday while I was on the phone talking to my brother, Andy, my landlord, Mike, dropped off the mail and I paid him the rent. There was a letter addressed to me, written in pencil, and the return address was Alex!!!

I tore it open, and it was a form letter from the Navy, but it started out with Dear_____, and Alex wrote "Mom". The letter explained that recruits will not be able to receive packages during this time, that food should not be sent to recruits, that they are not allowed to leave unless an immediate family member dies, etc. Cards and letters are encouraged to be sent.

On the last page to the bottom, Alex was allowed to write in the 3 lines available in the "Recruit's Comments" section. He wrote:

"Mom, things are going well. My stuff I wore home should be getting there soon. Please check for my driver's license. Need it in a bad way. Don't know when I'll get to call. Depends on how things go. Talk to you soon. Love, Al..."

If anyone would like to write to him, family, friends, or just those who would like to give my son some support by sending him a card to encourage him, please email me at alsmom27@yahoo.com, and I will send you his address.

I feel much better now that I've heard something.

I need to get busy, or this is going to be a loooonnnng nine weeks!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

Happy Halloween, everyone! I hope this holiday brings you lots of candy and other sweet things in your life. Fall came quickly and most of the leaves are now blown off the trees. No pictures from the North Shore this year, darn, but hopefully next year we will be able to go again.

I have been busy beyond belief. I am working hard at getting my home business up and running and it is taking longer than I anticipated, but that could just be because I'm impatient and anxious to get it going and be successful. But I don't want to get too ahead of myself and screw things up, so if it has to be slow, so be it. I am getting a lot of help from my mentor, Beth Erickson. She is phenomenal, and she and I clicked right from the get go, and the things she has taught me have given me more "light bulb" moments than Oprah! So, with her help, and my drive, I should be sipping champagne from my private jet in no time! LOL!

I am still working nights, still babysitting my nephew, Cannon, who is such a joy. He's more active and talking and it still amazes me that children soak up and learn so quickly, so I have had to watch my language around him.

Alex will be enlisting in the Navy this Spring, Thank God. He wanted to wait for a variety of reasons, and the fact he will be home for the holidays makes me want to jump up and down. I know he will be leaving, eventually, but I am now getting more acclimated to the idea of him going, and I think I will be ok with it when the time comes.

Tomorrow is the start of National Novel Writing Month. I am participating this year again. I am writing the sequel to the novel I wrote last year, "Office Politics", a murder mystery thriller. I decided to plot this year, which I hope will make the writing go a lot smoother and faster, and I hope to get my certificate saying I'm a winner. I know I am already, I just have to do it.

I won't wait another whole month before I post again. I have a lot of other things I want to share, but they can wait. In the meantime, have a great Halloween, and stay safe!

Back to School--Not this year!

School started yesterday for most of the schools in this area, and for the first time ever, I didn't have to wake my son up and make him breakfast for the first day of school. Weird. Really weird.

To tell the truth, this has been a weird summer. Hotter than usual, drought, humidity that brings memories of the Everglades in Florida, and just the fact that Alex won't ever go to school again, unless he chooses to. I went to Wal-mart last week and ended up in the Back to School section and nearly broke down. Looking at the colors, the markers, the notebooks and folders, the pens and pencils, erasers, the backpacks...it was just overwhelming to think I wouldn't have to buy any of that stuff again for him.

It's also been a really hard week since he called his Navy recruiter to enlist. Reality hits again. My son will be leaving for who knows how long, and I will not be looking for him to drive up after work, or be sitting in front of the television or computer playing video games, or chilling out on the couch watching a movie. I still have that to go through, but I think I will be ok. Not great. Just ok.

I won't promise I won't cry. I will probably shed buckets of tears, and will be down in the dumps for a while, but I do have other things in my life to keep me going. I have the LOML (Love of my life) QH, who promises that if I get too worked up, he will take me fishing or flash shiny objects in front of me to distract me. I have my nephew, Cannon, who I am still babysitting during the day, who is also turning into a little ball of fire. And, my writing, which I couldn't give up even if I tried (I tried, but then I couldn't breathe, so I had to go back to it. Life or death, you know!). I can't disappoint my fans at Pro Drywall (Lori, Karen and Diane, **waving** hey, girls!), or Dan on 3rd shift who reads my articles in Zimmerman Today every other week. Also, those friends and family members who "don't get it", it drives them crazy that I would pursue a writing career because they don't think I can be successful at it. Those are the ones I love the most, because when someone says "You can't", I say, "Watch me!"

Truth is, I have plenty to keep me busy until my son comes home, for a visit or for good. I am in the process of editing my first novel for publication, and working on the sequel. It's a murder suspense thriller and the sequel is coming along nicely. I have also started my own writing business, Crawford Writing Services, Inc., and I will be doing a lot of promotion for that. I also have a great project I'm working on with Zimmerman Today, plus, a lot of articles I plan to shop around to magazines and other publications. Lots to do.

But I still want to go school shopping anyway! Just for old times sake!

I surrender!

Ok, I admit it, I am mortal. I don't possess any supernatural powers, I cannot leap tall buildings in a single bound (I can't even hop from a boat to a dock without getting wet, sheesh!), ...and I cannot control the Universe. There, I feel much better now. I give up, and I am not going to keep trying anymore! I'm getting out of my own way. I submit. Tap, tap, tap!

What has brought me to this "lightbulb moment", you ask? Well, tomorrow my son, my only child, will be graduating from high school. There has been a large part of me that has been in denial of this since, oh, the first day of school this fall that this was indeed his Senior year. This was it. In true dysfunctional fashion, I have been in total denial that this was coming about, that it would be here so quickly, that time was NOT on my side, and God, the Universe, the Holy Trinity, has given me the spiritual equivalent of a smackdown! Hoo boy, did it hurt!

You see, all of the "bad luck" that has been occurring in my life has been a side effect of my denial. I realized this today, and it didn't cost me a dime or any time on the therapist's couch. I have been so wrapped up in thinking that this was going to take place later, that I realized that nope, tomorrow is it! No more school supplies to buy, no more backpacks to buy or forget in the morning rush, no more books to lug around, no more fingerpaintings of turkeys at Thanksgiving or metal geometric shapes welded together from shop class.

No more field trip fees! No more permission slips or medical emergency cards to fill out! Hey, I'm seeing the good side of this now! He, he!

All joking aside, I guess I have been stressing myself out and working myself into a stroke because I didn't want it to be over...not yet. When I put him on the bus that first day of Kindergarten, I was wiping the tears from my cheeks as the bus rounded the corner and looked across the streets to the other mothers in the neighborhood doing the same thing, then we all turned and went home. At least we knew we weren't alone. Now, my son is a grown man, who is driving, shaving, holding down a job, and I cannot believe that he is who he is, but mostly, I cannot believe he came from me!

I have a biased opinion, I know. But he is the kind of person I am proud and honored to know. Truly, I am. And I will be sitting in that fieldhouse, crying my eyes out and I am sure I will look around and see the other mothers from the neighborhood and we will nod and acknowledge each other and one of us will smile and the others will smile back as if to say, "Here we are again! Wasn't it just yesterday we put them on the bus for Kindergarten? Where did the time go?"

My son is taking the summer for himself, to have some fun with his friends, to work and save up some money. He is planning to enlist in the Navy and leave in the fall for boot camp. He's not doing it "just for the money" for college. I asked him if I hit the lottery if he would just take the money and go to college and he said, "No. I would still enlist in the Navy. I want to see the world." Fair enough. I totally support him on that. I'm still scared for him, our world is at war and there is a part of me that prays he never has to fulfill his duty as a soldier and kill someone or be killed or wounded himself, but if that is where his heart lies, I will be there to support him. So, when he takes that journey this fall, I will have a whole new set of worries, but I know my son will be taking the path that is right for HIM, not the path I think is right for him. And that right there tells me that we raised a fine, young man. And I am grateful to all of those who helped me make that possible. In a way, we are all graduating too. Congratulations!